The Blessing of a Fresh Start…Here’s to Chapter 3!

Life they say is a journey. I’ve always liked the sound of that; who wouldn’t want to go on a decades-long expedition collecting experiences and making connections that shape our existence. My problem with the word journey is that it sounds like a trip or a vacation, and I don’t know about you, but most of my life has been anything but. Looking back, I’d describe it as more of an uphill climb; it was real work. I’m sure there were some descents or at least a few plateaus along the way where I coasted a little, maybe caught my breath. But I honestly can’t remember them.

I was given a lot of responsibility as a child, mostly out of necessity but also because I believe my parents knew I thrived on it. There was plenty of love in our family but we were raised in an environment where working hard was our birthright and failure at anything wasn’t an option. No trophies were given for participation so I learned at an early age to meet each challenge with a determination well beyond my years. As an adult, I put every ounce of myself into caring for my growing family and tackling the demands of an ambitious career. My existence was an endless surge of deadlines to be met and goals to be accomplished; a personal and professional life carefully planned, diligently executed, and fortunately in the end reasonably successful. I’m sure for some of you reading this my life seemed horrible, but I promise you I loved every minute of it. It was my climb, my first chapter, and for fifty years I was in my comfort zone; hard charging and high achieving. I had purpose every single minute of every single day and found that tremendously satisfying . . . until the day I didn’t.

In successive years, my mother-in-law and the each of my parents passed away. I was still grappling with those losses when my younger sister was diagnosed with cancer and it was painfully obvious her long-term prognosis was not promising. The skillful juggling act that had served me so well for decades began to falter, and the incredible fulfillment that had once made up for all the personal sacrifices suddenly lost its luster. I found myself at the crossroad that ultimately led to the second chapter of my life.

I embarked on my new chapter with the goal of rejuvenating my broken spirit and within a short time made the decision to leave behind the career that had defined so much of my life. My new freedom gave me time to reconnect with family and friends; gradually I reclaimed a treasured part of my life I had allowed to drift away. But old habits were hard to break and without much conscious though I began filling my empty calendar with new endeavors – committees, boards, and even a new business startup. Not surprisingly after a few years I was back in familiar territory; I was spending most of my days doing the things I had to do rather than the things I wanted to do. But this time I was a little quicker to course correct.

Now once again freed from the grip of my day planner, I am eagerly in pursuit of my next chapter. But this time there’s a big difference; I’m not broken like I was a decade ago. Quite the opposite really; I’m probably more centered than I’ve ever been. And unlike my first retirement, when I had absolutely no concept of what I was going to do with myself, at sixty I have so many ideas swirling in my head, I only pray I’ll be blessed with enough time and continued good health to pursue them.

And so, my journey begins. Yes, journey is now the right word. I finally feel like my climb is over; I have little to prove and oh, so much to enjoy and explore and share. And with that, I officially launch Chapter 3 . . .